THE GREEN BAY PORKERS

In the mid-sixties the wives of PAL coaches or mothers of players held a football game against the Barnett Bank of Naples softball team. So it was a softball team, close enough. Ours, was no team at all, just a bunch of wives in PAL uniforms. The cheerleaders were the men, dressed in wigs and cheerleader dresses. What parts of them that would fit in. It turned out to be a vigorous  and enjoyable contest.

Concurrently, the City had been on the cops and firemen to improve their physical condition. Most of our folks were strong as grizzlies, but some were a tad round. Inspiration hit. Why not have a football game between the NPD and the NFD. A great way to exercise and have fun at the same time. The game was on.

We were practicing at Cambier Park one evening when a group of thugs from East Naples approached us. How would the bad ass cops like to play some real men? Bring 'em on was the immediate response. We needed a tuneup game anyhow before we tackled the Firemen.

The rules were to be regular flag football rules. No tackling. Blocking was fair. The play was dead as soon as the flag--a rag type thing--was stripped from the runner's belt.

We kicked off to East Naples, and a runner broke down the sideline. That is until Byron Tomlinson hit him with a vicious tackle. Whoops, this was flag football. But, we knew all these jerks from arresting them and didn't like any of them. And they weren't big fan's of ours. So the fight was on.

I noticed C.H.Dasher with a thug under each arm, banging their heads together. Barrie Kee, a giant, was sitting on two more, squashed under his bulk into the dirt. He was alternatively selecting body parts of the two and twisting until they screamed like sirens. Man-to-man scuffles prevailed all over the field. Finally everyone ran out of gas and the East Naples Thugs limped home. So much for tuneups.

When time for the real game arrived the rules were the same as the practice game. Our team was named the Green Bay Porkers, with our lovely wives as cheerleaders. We also had a real pig named Arnold as a mascot. And after the kickoff the game proceeded pretty much as the rules defined. Our offense was built on a running back who'd played college football, Charles Barton. Charles was so fast we relied on two plays: Charles Left and Charles Right. No one could catch him.

Soon the blocks became a little more vigorous and flag was forgotten and tackles began. Although no fights occurred, it wasn't for sissies.

Some of casualties were our kick-off artist, Ken Claveau, who charged the ball, gave a mighty kick, and missed the ball. This hyper-extended his knee and he was on crutches for some time. Richard Aldacosta got his back knocked out of whack and walked for months with his chest seeming to be six-inches East of his rear end and legs. Byron Tomlinson busted his knee, requiring surgery to repair. There couldn't have been a contestant who wasn't hobbled for a few days.

When the bills for our game came in, the City lost interest in exercise programs. As I recall, they were over 60K, a lotta money for the time. That didn't count lost recuperation time and worker comp.

There was never a rematch.