The Naples Police Chief with the shortest reign lasted about six months. He was a retired army Colonel who both the City and he thought had the perfect background for the job. Wrong! Soldiers are stuck with who commands them. They can be put in the brig if they don't follow orders. Cops don't. To soldiers a Colonel is a person with formidable powers. The lowliest cop has more power than a Colonel. To cops a retired military officer is someone who used to have power. I worked for one retired Marine colonel who knew what he was doing. This one did not. And he lasted six months.
He did nearly everything wrong. On the one occasion he tried to do something right, it was a disaster.
To win over the cops who generally despised him, the Colonel decided he was going to have a party. Dave Dampier and I counseled him not to do it, that cops could get wild and woolly. He laughed off our advice. He'd been dealing with the "troops" all his adult life.
He didn't realize that the cops hated him because he'd been made Chief without ever being a cop--the ultimate insult to the rank and file.
Trapped into attending, Sandy and I arrived late and left early. On arriving, we found the Colonel's wife visibly shaken. A nice lady, who deserved better, she'd already become a victim of the rowdies.
Several drunken cops were on the their knees, on the kitchen floor, shooting craps. When a five was thrown, you could hear, "Fever in the cathouse, go ho, go." One or two had puked on the carpet. Others staggered around like zombies, looking for more booze. Rude humor, in loud voices, ricocheted off the walls. It was obvious that the guests were being extra obnoxious on purpose.
I gathered up Sandy and we ran for the hills. On Monday morning I expected to find an enraged Chief, taking notes on how he would extract his revenge. Quite to the contrary. Sitting behind his desk, staring blankly at nothing, he mumbled my Pussy Cat glasses. Confused, I went to find Dave.
"He had a set of Pussy Cat glasses--some piss-willy drink made with Early Times. The guys stole them all. Emptied his liquor cabinet, too. Don't know about you, but I'm gonna find something to do out of the office today. Maybe all week."
"Need a driver?" I said.
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