BANK SECURITY NAPLES STYLE

  Was a time banks, to keep their FDIC Insurance valid, had to have a security check by the local cops. At least, the two banks here, Bank of Naples and First National, did. We alway found so many security mistakes we called the inspections "Insecurity, keep your money under the mattress" checks. This lax mentality was understandable since neither institution had ever been robbed, at least in recent memory. So the bank's mind set was: Why bother, who's gonna rob a bank in The Elephant's Graveyard?

 Actually, the First National Bank didn't do a terrible job with  security. It was Miz Mamie Tooke's Bank of Naples that needed the tune-up. 

 As an example, they'd just installed drive-up windows in the alley behind the bank--four or five of them. The FDIC required that money delivered to an exterior drive-up booth be supplied through some method that keeps the cash secure. Pneumatic tubes, something like that, connecting to the main building. Mamie's bank didn't do that. Don't know how she got around the rule but she wouldn't do it. Too expensive. Each booth was self contained and free standing. To get the money out there in the morning, a clerk wheeled a cart with $45,ooo for each window on it. Just a clerk, no guard, or nuttin'.

  I talked to Miz Tooke about this just-asking-for-it practice. She said she'd start having a guard go with them, but she never did.

 Another problem was the clerks sat in those little remote booths all day with all that money. Sitting duckies for a robber.

 Mamie wasn't worried about this either. The booths were bulletproof, she said. And the rear entrance door was steel with good locks. I told her they were still vulnerable and if I wanted to rob them how I'd do it. 
 I went to a booth and knocked on the rear door. "Who is it?" came the response. 
 I mumbled an unintelligible name.
In a second the door was unlocked and opened and a clerk, surprised to see me and Miz Tooke said, "Who. . .?"

 All the clerks in the other booths fell for the same scam when I knocked. So much for locks. 
 Mamie was aghast and said she'd take care of that. But I don't think she ever did.

  I believe that Mamie was so cavalier about security because she knew that no one that knew her--and that was everyone in Naples--was fool enough to rob her and evoke her considerable rage. 
 And she was probably right cause it never happened.